I Love Who?

Nights like tonight is when I hate my bed, it's too big for one person. I may not know what it is like to have a strong embrace around me, but that doesn't mean I don't crave it. Cause I do, nearly every night.

It's always the same question: "So anyone your interested in?" or "Have you meet anyone recently?" and it's always the same answer, "No." Followed by a lie: "I like being single, it's fun. Plus I don't have time for a relationship." Followed by a fake smile to get everyone off my back.

People don't see it, they don't see that I hate being single, that I hate that fact that I have never told someone I love them because deep inside it kills me.

I feel like it will never happen to me, and why is that? why don't I get to experience this feeling? I feel like something is wrong with me that I will forever be repeating the statement above. What will happen to me?

People tell me don't go looking for it, it will happen when you least expect it. Well I am still waiting.

I am 21 years old and I have never fallen in love, never been held in an embrace overnight, never been told that I am beautiful by that someone special and I have never whispered the words

"I Love You"

A Sisters Birthday

So today it is my older sisters birthday, and unfortunately I am not with her to celebrate her birthday like she was for mine although I will be seeing her in two days time when I visit home for Easter.

So since I am not with her today I thought I would give her a dedication on my page.

My sister and I have a very strong bond after all we have been through together and I can imagine it will only get stronger as the years go on. Some days she drives me crazy and other days she is the only one who understands what I am going through, and through it all I know she will always be there for me and I for her that's the great thing about a sisters bond it's unbreakable.

So Happy 23rd Birthday to my amazing, smart and beautiful sister I can't wait to see you in two days time.

My summer in a nutshell

This post has been a long time coming now, but with unforeseen circumstances it meant the delay in this post. However I am here to give you a list of my highs and lows for summer, as summer is now officially over in the southern hemisphere and autumn is slowly making itself known here in Auckland.
So here we go:

The Highs

• Having four months off Uni to enjoy the summer months was spectacular and possibly a very rare occurrence so I tried to soak up as much of it as I could.
• I turned 21 this summer!
• My birthday wish came true, that was for my family to spend my birthday in Auckland with me and half of my family surprised me by coming up which was AMAZING!
• Moving house and meeting my amazing new flat mates who are from all over the world, so I now have even more connections for when I travel.
• I read an inspirational book that has changed my life.
• I have become a more healthier person and do regular exercise which has resulted in me losing weight.
• It was my first summer away from home and I managed to support myself (with some help from my mother now and then) by working hard, and I feel I am a more independent person because of it.
• I only got sun burnt twice which is a new record.
• Going home for Christmas was a major high point as I miss them dearly.
• Getting to know all the locals who come into work was an unexpected bonus.
• My childhood friend came up to see me for a weekend, it was a great weekend.

The Lows

• Working for a majority of the summer meant I didn't get out as much as I would have liked.
• Spending New Years alone was a buzz kill night, and having to work the next morning made me feel even more lonely.
• Moving out of my old apartment was sad as I loved the place and I miss my old flat mate at times.
• Catching the worst flu right at the end of summer was not fun! (that is why this is being posted late)
• Getting sun burnt is never fun!
• Realising that I do not own a bikini because I am unsure about my body.
• Did not save as much money as I was hoping to. 

For my first summer in Auckland I would say it was a pretty successful one. Of course like anything there are low points but I'm becoming a more positive person and focusing on the positives in life and embracing what surrounds me.
I have to say that I am grateful for the amazing summer I had, but I am looking forward to some cooler months that are ahead as well.
So goodbye summer and hello autumn!

HAIM - Falling

Beach and Lanterns: Another great saturday

I was lucky enough to have a whole weekend off work, so I took the most of it by visiting Mission Bay and going to the Chinese Lantern Festival.

Mission Bay is such a beautiful place and the weather was stunning. I collected some sea shells which now I will be googling what to do with them, I relaxed in the sun (got a little bit burnt) and of course went to Kiwiyo and treated myself to some amazing frozen yoghurt.

That night my flatmates and I ventured to the Chinese Lantern Festival which is held to celebrate the Chinese New Year, and it was crazy busy I was shocked and a little overwhelmed. We even got half a watermelon and managed to eventually finish it off, it was amazing but I think I ate my weight in watermelon! The lanterns were beautiful and there were so many, my favourite is the last photo.

Flat bonding, beach, lanterns and such a beautiful day it was a very good Saturday.

Wine, Zoo and Fire: What every weekend needs

This weekend a friend visited me from my little hometown in the South Island, and for the first time in what has felt like months I had the whole weekend off. So I made the most of it by doing what any normal person would do, which is going to the zoo. It has to be one of my favourite places to go to in Auckland as the animals always have a way of making you happy, excited about life and also makes you feel slightly like a child. 

Other than the zoo we of course had some wine, went out on Friday night, ate far too much food (but who can resist Movenpick) and early this morning (Sunday here in NZ) 6am to be exact, the fire alarm went off which meant evacuating the building while three fire trucks pulled up to turn off the false alarm.

So you could say it was a pretty eventful weekend.

A Farewell

Yesterday was one of my friends dads funeral. I have only known her for a year but for such a tragedy to happen to such a fun loving person really does break my heart. I have never lost any one close to me so I could not imagine what she is going through right now. She is such a brave and strong person and all my love goes out to her and her family. If you have ever lost some close/dear to you my heart goes out to you.

It makes me realise how fragile life can be, and that we must live every day as if it was our last. Sometimes life doesn't make sense, but just stop take a breath and look around at all the beauty life gives you and in return live your life to full!

Zimmerman a/w 2013

Here is the first look for Zimmerman's autumn/winter 2013 collection and so far so good. With warm natural browns present and a spot of colour this collection is looking very desirable. I am especially loving Dazed Knitted Fur Jacket (picture 2).

The more earthy colours really reflect the coming up season and the added colour in the collection emphasises that colour isn't only for summer, you just tone it down in the cooler months of the year and follow more pastel/lighter colours rather than brights. 

You can see the trends like texture, 60's influence and tailored jackets in this collection.

FANTASTIQUE MAGNIFIQUE 2013 by Karen Walker

I am loving what is to come from Karen Walker in 2013. The clothes picture above are only a handful of my favourite pieces from the next collection Fantastique Magnifique, all these clothes pictured are for the Southern Hemisphere section, since that is where I live I am mainly interested in these pieces.

I am especially loving all the blue clothes, but that could be because it is my favourite colour. This collection is clean cut and features trends like white on white, ruffles, sixties influence and tailored suits all of which are going to be big hits in the Southern Hemisphere come Autumn and Winter.

My wardrobe will be dreaming of owning many pieces of Karen Walker's collection Fantastique Magnifique.

Laneway Festival at Home

Top to bottom: ALT-J, Bat for Lashes and Of Monsters and Men.

So today in Auckland is the Laneway festival, a perfect way to spend Auckland Anniversary holiday (if you live in Auckland) as it is a day off for the region. But if you are like me and could not afford to attend this great festival at Silo Park why not throw your own Laneway Festival at home.

All you need is some of the acts who are performing at Laneway on your iPod, either a dock system or headphones and some room to dance and move around. Now is that so hard?

Just because you aren't there doesn't mean you have to miss out on hearing some amazing tunes. Okay so the environment might not be the same as actually being there, but just make the most of what you have got and loose yourself to the music for a while.

Getting Inspired

So I have been in my new apartment for over a week now and I am slowly getting use to my new surroundings. I love waking up and seeing the beautiful Mt Eden right in front of me instead of another building and living with new people from all over the world is always a bonus (and we are all slowly getting to know each other better).

With a new place I have also decided to become a better me. I am already somewhat of a positive person but everyone needs that little extra something to help get them through some days, so I started reading Miranda Kerr's book Treasure Yourself. I have wanted to read this book for about a year now and I finally went out and got it and I have to say it has changed my thinking and attitude in a whole new way. I am now eating a lot more healthy, I am going for walks/runs, I have joined a gym and I am thinking more positve about myself and my surroundings.

So I suggest you go out and buy this book because it can dramatically change your life for the better.

"I love writing the script of my life" - Miranda Kerr

Charlie Brown - On My Way (Official Video)

Inspiration 101

I am currently in the processing of finding a second job, one that is related to the media industry so I can get a feel of the industry. I knew it was going to be hard, but I think that worst part is when you don't hear back from people, even if it is a no it would be nice to get any type of reply.

It makes me wonder has this world become soft and they don't want to tell people the truth in order to avoid hurting their feelings. I believe that these harsh truth's help make a person grow, every rejection opens up another door and with this one rejection you know that you will eventually find the place where life intended you to be.

So don't be afraid of the rejection's you might recieve. Take it, learn from it and move on.

x

Ketz-ke Summer 12

Although designers are starting to bring out their winter collections for 2013 (since I live in the Southern Hemisphere winter is coming) I still would rather look at the summer collections as the weather is still beautiful over here.

Theses are a few of my favourite pieces from Ketz-ke Summer 12 collection, I love that you can easily see yourself wearing these pieces with what you may already have in your wardrobe. The outfits are fun and casual with a streetwear edge to them.

Ketz-ke Website

21st Birthday Weekend

So a couple of weekends ago I turned the big 21! but deciding to be different I didn't throw a big shin dig (otherwise known as a party) instead my sister, mum and her partner came up and surprised me in Auckland for the weekend. My nana and grandad I knew were coming up but what a shock it was to see my sister standing outside my apartment building and later that night to turn around and see my mum, it was the nest 21st present ever! 

My sister and I walked to the Auckland domain and ventured around the wintergarden pavilion and the museum on the friday before the rest of the clan arrived. On my actual birthday my family and I ferried across to Waiheke Island and spent the day walking around the hilly island trying to find a vineyard, which we everntually did, but I was worried my nana or grandad would have a heart attack, but they are still fit and strong. That night we went out for an amazing meal and later drinks (which ended with just me and my sister and a few shots)

I remember my mum asking me what I wanted for my birthday present and I said: " For everyone to come up to Auckland and we can all go to Waiheke Island" I was so happy that this actually happened, I love my mum, sister, nana and grandad so much they are my rocks and without them I don't know where I would be today. 

So remember to tell your family you love them as you only have one family so treasure them well!